State of Emergency (sort of...)

Despite a tendency to end up in zip cuffs, as Patrick so kindly pointed out, I have in fact stayed well clear of the current ruckus in Manila (if you missed the word, you can check out the BBC's take here). Ya'll will be quite relieved to know that Peace Corps expressly forbids us from getting involved in, or express opinions about local politics. Thankfully I can be as vocal as I desire about my own country's politics...

It also has had very little affect on life here. There is a huge divide between life in Manila and life "in the Provinces." I'm sure everyone in town has heard the news, but it hasn't come up at all in any of my own daily interactions. When GMA (the president) was threatened with impeachment earlier this year for alleged election fraud everyone was very blasé about the whole ordeal. One corrupt government replaced by another didn't appear to rank high in peoples concerns about life. I find a lot of apathy about the government and the feeling that it is corrupt and unfixable. So, they continue to have their shenanigans in Manila and we continue our quiet life here in Ifugao. Hopefully it will continue in that vein. In the meantime Peace Corps has banned all non-necessary travel to Manila and I'll wait and see what happens from here like everyone else... sans the zip cuffs.

On another note, the coup plotters weren't the only ones planning events around the 20 year anniversary of Marcos' fall from power. The BBC World Service did a great documentary on People Power in the Philippines that you can find and listen to here. I caught part II and it does a fairly good job of providing background and looking at the state of the politics in the Philippines. Life in an emerging democracy is never boring on the political front.

What Are Friends For?

I guess in this instance that would involve trekking all over Makati for a small Apple store and picking up a new iPod supplied under warranty but delayed in arrival. That was the amazing favor supplied to me by Amber, who also happens to forward me my Peace Corps pouch (mail) every week and other little odds and ends. Most recently the flea powder to assuage my dog and I of that particular vermin. I'm so far out in the mountains that LBC (the UPS equivalent) doesn't deliver here so Amber gets to trot my mail out to the Mayoyao bus every week and send it on its circuitous journey out that way. I have some friends in the Visayas that have the make the equivalent of that 5 hour one way trip to get their mail. I don't know what I would do without her.

Here's the point where all of you can factor in! As my iPod was officially declared Dead On Arrival that also means all the music that was on it now resides in the digital equivalent of heaven. If any of you find some free time in the recent future and could help raise my current music selection above the 10 CDs I have now I would be forever grateful. I've already awarded Hero of the Month to Amber, but that doesn't mean you can't have a huge impact on the soundtrack of the rest of my service.

What to send you ask? Like the rest of my generation, I listen to everything. Really. With that in mind I would suggest one of the three discs getting the most play time in your life right now, or maybe one of those discs you think simply belongs in any musical collection. There is enough variety of people who wander here that should cover quite a wide spectrum. To help facilitate ideas and prevent duplicates I would also encourage you to post a reply with whatever humble offerings you might dig up.

Worried about copyright? Bless your soul. I would never encourage the illegal copying and transferring of music.

Remember you can always post as anonymous.

New Member of the Family

While we decided to skip over the Greek pronunciation to a more phonetic sounding approach to avoid similarities with existing peoples' names, Charon is still happily adjusting to life at the fish hatchery in the sky.
I am also happily adjusting to life with her. We made it through our first night last night without her waking me up to go "out back" and she's currently passed out beside my desk here at the office after an exciting trip down the hill sticking out of my backpack. Which is great, as I've been busy printing off over a thousand survey forms with an old fashion continuous feed printer. Thankfully the paper is carbon copy so we only have to actually print half that number, but still not the most stimulating activity for a young pup now is it?

Imagine...

Standing before you a steel clad figure with his visor up & sword & shield stowed on his back non-chalantly removing his chain mail gauntlet finger by finger with which he promptly, an evil glint in his eye, casually backhands you across the face. As you recover from the sudden explosion of stars & your surprise you the hear the unambiguous *thud* of steel hitting dirt & a calm cocky voice uttering the single, precise word:

“Challenge.”

I challenge you for the next week to keep in forefront of your mind what life would be like without a refrigerator. Put a big Sticky Note on the front of the behemoth to remind you of that every time you go to get a swig of OJ or a cold cut of meat. While you’re shopping for groceries notice the shear number of products that are either found in the refrigerator aisle, or more subtly, are labeled with the dread phrase “Refrigerate After Opening.” (You might even find a few items that you’re supposed to refrigerate but don’t).

Life's a lot different without that power-sucking, mass of steel that dominates your kitchen. Maybe next week you can think about what it'd be like without the stove. :o)

Musings From Vacation

In the back of my mind I have always know that the various PCVs in country have extremely different experiences depending on where they are placed, but that reality was made palpable by my visit to Heather & Mike at their post in Cebu over Christmas. Cebu is the 2^nd largest city in the Philippines and is advertised as a cleaner version of Manila. Its found on the southern island of, you guessed it, the island of Cebu, right across the channel from Bohol where Bridget & I were diving. Mike lives in a small studio apartment, belongs to a gym, spends most of his time at the mall for lack of any other options and generally lives the kind of life you would expect to find in an urban environment anywhere. Its one thing to know this via texting and quite another for me to see it in person. It was the little things that caught me off guard. The ability to go to the gym or a coffee shop at will or to find good health conscious vegetarian food.

The most astounding experience of my trip there was to taste real milk for the first time in 9 months. Not the powdered milk I mix up for breakfast, nor the powdered milk re-mixed for me in country I can buy at the store, but real honest straight-from-the-cow (&-then-pasteurized-bottled-&-shipped-over-from-New-Zealand, but still) milk. I’m sure the fact that it also happened to be whole milk factored into the overwhelming taste, but regardless of fat content it exploded upon my brain bringing back the far distant memories of milk & cereal in the mornings and gallons upon gallons of milk found within ease grasp at the grocery store or gas station. To rediscover something you had not know you missed is quite the jolt to the system. I’m left wondering how many other little surprises will knock me sideways at an unexpected moment of recognition of something from a different reality. Reverse culture shock will definitely be interesting if nothing else…

Inspiration

I was going to begin this post with a reference to an obscure, yet interesting writer or artist whom I read about in the Economist. Alas, along with the exact nature of this enigmatic person’s trade, I could not find the article again. Still, he had some great thoughts on inspiration via people as opposed to nature for his work and that’s the idea I wanted to capture. Being inspired by people.

My godparents asked me if I found a place I could see God in all of this and their comment brought the original article to mind. I do see God in the beautiful mountains that surround me every day, but that is still a passive view of God; a reminder of God’s power and awe inspiring wonder. These past few days I have been reminded of the dynamic side of God’s love through all of you. Its amazing how I can be half the world away and yet still be in touch with so many people. The timely reminder of how I got here and sitting at the Mountain’s desk clutching a well worn essay on Why I Want to Join the Peace Corps (I guess only “well worn” in that digital sort of way…) asking for his guidance. The ever present texts and phone calls of Bridget, reminding me that even relationships that go to the ultimate depths can survive on such thin connections. Prayers from Richard and his own community here in Cyberia. A poetic exploration of the West Bank and starting a bit of life there; reminders of other, older, timely advice from Peter that life was not all about school. Emails from my little sister, my godparents, my parents, you. I have been blessed with so many wonderful people in my life with so many amazing skills and ways of reaching out across the void to say “Hey.” I don’t think anything concrete has changed here in the past few days. The reminder that all of you are out there in real and tangible ways has changed me.

And that's why I cam here in the first place, because it certianly wasn't just for the view.

Anatomy of a Valentine's Day Box

I should be so blessed to have parents who both remember & decide to send a Valentines Day box (so timed, with a bit of luck to arrive on the very date!) & with such love contained inside as can only be shown by parents at their best.

With a well documented Jelly Belly’s preference dominated by the color green, an exquisite mix remaining true to the seasons Red & White colors devoid of any of those particularly strong or awful flavors that can so easily dominate & take away from the joy of the simple plunge & eat method of consumption.

A conscious or unconscious nod to the candy dish traditions of our household throughout my formative years with the addition of a bag of red hots and the candy hearts with words. It simply wouldn’t be valentines day without them.

Remembrance of strange habits forgotten by the precipitator of them via lack of the medium. I’m still mystified by both how my mother remembered, and then managed to find the Australian Chewing Sticks I so loved to gnaw on during my ASP days. I had to mail order them via internet after discovering them from one of my volunteers. Where she managed to rustle some up I have no idea.

The realization of a unique challenge of living in a culture that does not normally use toilet paper via the inclusion of “Charmin to Go.”

The element of surprise, even overcoming the customs designation on the outside of the box. Usually I manage to remove without looking, but the damage bottom of the box necessitated a comparison of two forms revealing the inclusion of such an unseen or used item, whether a college dorm or native house, as a pack of napkins. Yet, contrary to the typical conclusion of pink & red heart covered ridiculousness, one is greeted by the Chinese Year of the Dog with a note reminding you of the also so hailed year of your birth.

Chocolate. Even better, Dark Chocolate. Self explanatory :o) But on top of that Chocolate in Tupperware containers! Both keeping the prized items safe from the ants & then doubling as my lunch containers to work in the future.

A book & notebook. Not just any book, but Night by Elie Wiesle, “My next serious read.” So that I might be able to continue reading along with Mom (and Dad?) the books they’re reading.

Thanks Mom and Dad! A well timed box of love combined with the literal outpouring of love and support from all of you has meant so much to me. Its wonderful to be reminded that “…yes, it's a little harder to bounce ideas back and forth when you're living in a valley above a videoke bar in the philippines and most people you might know &care about (maybe i shouldn't make that assumption...but i think it's at least partially true) are in the states, but not impossible…”.

Last Stand of the Japanese

The weekend itself was actually a very enjoyable experience. Jackson Lee came to visit and we hiked up Mt. Nagchajun, which was one of the last stands of the Japanese during WWII. They holed up on this mountain and the Americans shelled the tar out of them while General Yamashito was surrendering in a different part of Ifugao (Kiangan). Its an awesome hike with an even better view.

With a chicken waiting its demise below for dinner and lessons in how to make unleavened bread it was a wonderful Saturday indeed.

To top it off, I finally discovered a way to shrink images on my post-Photoshop computer making them much easier to upload and share! Hopefully the top image will expand to the size it is on my computer so you can get a good view of town. Enjoy!

Guarded Optimism

Chaos Theory appeals to me. The basic premise being that we live in a deterministic reality but the factors are so numerous and entangled that it is impossible to track the subtle changes that affect the world (and of course it goes on from there to get much more in depth, speaking, if you know of any good books that elaborate the point...). What calculus possibly goes into determining my state of mind at any point in time must create equations longer than I am tall. Monday was an interesting grab bag of events and ended with an incredibly uplifting piece of news.

Jerry and I attempted to present the project proposal we created at the PDM & Solid Waste Management conferences last month to Florence, our supervisor. This at least ended in a vague idea of a direction forward to move, but failed miserably on the whole sustainable, community supported idea front. I still have the overwhelming impression that Florence just wants me to sit in the corner and magically produce cash, or barring that, to follow the pattern set my early Peace Corps and present a project of my own choosing and ram it on through for the betterment of all. Still, the fact that something was happening and we continue having those arguments is a plus. Now I start working on a recyclables characterization survey so we have some base data to work with.

In the afternoon I ended up hiking out to a water source they want to develop to supply the Hostel that the Phil Department of Tourism is building in order to ascertain the elevation and if the water would actually flow. This was done on request of the Mayor, delivered in writing with an hour and a half notice to eat and change into suitable clothes. Still, the hike was enjoyable, and while I would much rather be showing someone how to use their GPS unit, if that’s my ticket to the table, I'll take what I can get at this point in time. Horace & Manuel were also good company and I finally got some information on the planned system that I had been nosing about for. As usual, we'll see if I can find a way to be included in the rest of the project, but it was a start.

I think the base of any improvements to my mindset comes from two fronts. The first is simply doing something. I would not rank the morning meeting as much of a success, but it was progress. Something was done and can hopefully be followed up on with the debate continuing in its own non-confrontational, avoidance kind of way. The second comes from having something to look forward too. I remember back to my high school days intuitively finding something to look forward the next day or week before I would go to bed at night. That always sustained me and helped me jump out of bed in the morning ready to face the day. I need to get that attitude back. So, we continue on the roller coaster ride of emotions. As long as I keep moving in some direction and keep finding things to look ahead to, this whole gig can continue to be quite the amazing ride.

Along the things to look forward line of thinking, the news I received via text yesterday was a huge plus. Check it out for yourself here.

Philippine Ultimate Association

Christmas in Mayoyao

I pulled the pictures off my camera this weekend and found some fun shots. I thought this one would be a nice counter-balance to the general feeling of gloom from last night. A huge thanks to my parents for making sure I had a wonderful 1st Christmas here in the Philippines!

A Single Branch

I do not know what it is I need that is missing. This point seems rather obvious in some ways, because if I did know, I would have rectified whatever was lacking long ago. As is, I just feel lost and alone and empty. What is it? If I was home I know what I would do to fill the void. In some ways I feel like I can describe what is lacking, but not why its lacking here. I don’t feel like I am learning anything or growing or evolving in any direction. At home, on any particular weekend, I might be playing frisbee at the highest competitive level that would let me play. Or I would be out pushing my body & mind in a completely different direction rock climbing, either in a gym, or more preferable out in some distant wilderness with close friends. After a long days work I would be able to look forward to a loosely planned engagement to meet at a bar. Or would be living and existing close enough to know that such plans would be formed, even if it ended up being simply sitting out on the back staircase to my apartment building with my roommate, two good beers, and a discussion of life. There would be a plethora of people around who both cared & knew a little bit about current events and would love to exchange views and opinions about the current Dutch cartoons fiasco or Iran’s brinkmanship. Any given evening a friend might come by on a down night looking for someone to talk to or to cheer them up. Any given night I would have three or four people around whom I could look up if such a need would arise for myself.

Its not that there aren’t people around with whom I could interact. It’s the form of that interaction that seems to be off. I know for a fact I could go down and join the videoke, whose sound comes wafting up my hill, but I have no strong desire to join in the drinking to obliteration that goes with such an activity. This morning I could have joined a church service, but two and half hours of conservative religion of which I cannot understand nor with which I would agree with if I could is not a pleasant experience. I can go in to work and sit at my desk and watch everyone else appear to do nothing 75% of the time they are at the office, which is a hit or miss in of itself.

I do not see the drive & ambition… excitement, to improve ones surroundings and ones self in anyone. Something that has always been so fundamental to my own definition of self and way of life.

I miss the Habitat board meetings. We were very far from perfect in getting things done, even the good ideas we thought of and tried to pursue in the midst of our crazy busy lives, but there was such energy in that room. Everyone was there because they wanted to be. They wanted to get something done and make a difference. I feel like my ubiquitous question of why do you get up in the morning would be anathema here. It would be like speaking a foreign language. Does not compute. People get up because that is what they did yesterday. Like much of the States. Like much of the world. People get up and go to work to provide for their families and make it through until tomorrow. Or to morn those who did not. Or to celebrate the union of two souls or another gracing our tiny town. I’m used to that in people. I’m just also used to having other people around who feel as I do and with whom I can work with. People from whom I can draw energy and exponentially increase my own. I enjoy reading the Economist and playing guitar and running and learning the Arabic alphabet and reading Dickens and about development theory and studying for the GREs (well, maybe not quite as much that) but all of those things done in a vacuum are of little worth. I want to be able to talk to others about them. To laugh and joke or stay up all night in an intense discussion about Life, the Universe & Everything (by Douglas Adams, or otherwise). A single stick burning alone provides no one light. Is there simply no fire here? Does it take a different form? Or am I not finding it? More importantly how do I decide? How do I go about answering those questions? When is it time to pack up my charred branch and go find more heat?

I admit I did have one over arching expectation upon joining the Peace Corps. I expect to find people who cared. Both about improving their communities and working with the Volunteer they requested. I have not found that here.

Post #100!

& what a journey its been so far.


I got a kick out of this bit of news I picked up from my college's newsletter. I guess I am earning all those bits of mail they keep sending me, though I find it laughable that most of them are asking for donations... didn't they read the address??

Macalester named a top-25 Peace Corps volunteer producing institution

Macalester has been named to the list of top 25 for small schools producing Peace Corps volunteers. Macalester appears at number 20 on the list with 17 alumni currently serving as volunteers. Since Peace Corps' inception, 296 alumni of Macalester have joined its ranks. Dartmouth College is number one for small schools with 37 alumni currently serving. The University of Wisconsin at Madison takes the top spot for all schools with 104 volunteers serving in the field.

(source: http://www.macalester.edu/alumni/macwire/)

"Integrating" Past the Tellers

Its amazing when you know where you need to go, who you need to talk to and what you need to say how quick and easy getting things done in the Philippines can actually be. For all our complaining about how slow the pace of life here is, I begin to wonder how much of that is just because we have no idea how to get things done when we're not in our ultra-efficient, 24 hour convenience world.

I think back to the first time I tried to get a few of the travelers checks mom send me with changed over. I was in Solano during training and since my bank account was based out of Manila (even though it was the same parent bank) I had to argue my way through three different people just to see the bank manager who distrusted me & my travelers check just as much as I distrusted him and his bank tellers telling me they needed the security stub from the check and that they stopped processing checks at 10am (which if you've never used TCs before is the part of the check you use to reclaim your money if the original gets stolen, ie, the part you don't carry around with you.) In the end I left my signed no-less-than-four-times check with him to be processed the next day and till next week when I could pick it up just hoping he didn't "forget" about the whole business by then. I was on pins and needles all that week, but everything worked out just fine in the end.

Today I rolled into the Santiago City PNB branch, where I just so happen to have my account based out of, walked right past all the guards & tellers to the Sales & Services Head's desk and sat down. Within fifteen minutes I was ready to leave, once again leaving my check in his hands to be processed on Monday (they stop processing checks at noon) complete with his cell phone number so I could text to find out when the money goes in. Of course, the first time I pulled out a travelers check in this bank one of the guards panicked and told me the bank closed at ten despite the fact that he had opened the door to let me in, it was already one, and there were plenty of other customers about. That was the time I learned to skip past the front if I needed something besides general banking services.

Patience is swiftly ingrained way past what anyone could believe their limits are. So much so that a member of my batch, upon meeting the PCVs who had been in country a year at his site for the first time, called them all apathetic to their faces. Now we all understand the changes that occur. I wouldn't call any of us apathetic today, but you slowly learn what situations you can impact and which you just need to sit and wait and it will all shake out. I still think a lot of things in this country are simply slow. Take the bus from my site for example, but its also good to be reminded how much of it is also because we don't know all the "rules" of the game we're playing. Those can be learned. The bus, on the other hand, is always going to be slow.